Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Male Genital Exam By Female Doctor


Group photo of those attending the route. First we distinguish the left Moncloveño. (Photo Layer)

Dear Readers SUN AND FLIES, I transcribe a first received in our editorial that his undoubted journalistic value'm sure will be of interest. This is a first person narrative of one of those attending the traditional route of Las Rozas Gefrema held every January, popularly known as Memorial Amundsen. " I've taken the liberty of degree:


Dear Florentino Sanders, I am writing in my bedroom lying over 39-foot-mouth and raw, but with the satisfaction of knowing that I have managed to overcome the octroi, the pride of thinking that I'm one of them. Then I attach the page of my Sunday newspaper for the day when I had the honor of attending my first route as Gefrema partner, if you consider of interest and want to publish. MADRID

20011 January 30

8:00 a.m. sounds the alarm. Today is the big day, I'll finally be able to attend a Gefrema path. I get up like a spring, go to the kitchen for breakfast, nerves and anxiety prevent me from eating, I took only coffee. 8:55 a.m.
Volume Circular Metro line, deserted at that hour, car share with a young man sprawled over two seats vanished, showing all the symptoms have already completed several full laps of the ring during the night.
9:35. I am low Moncloa station, I feel like a tickle in the back, no doubt due to the emotion of the moment. I turn to the basin 11 at a fast pace, I would not be late. In the distance distinguish some cliques, without doubt, the brave hosts gefremeras, the legs I tremble. I get confused between the present without daring to utter a word. Some look at me, their eyes I weigh. I can distinguish between these mythical one of the components of this worthy partnership, including handheld and your gorrilla feature which can be nothing more than the legendary Bazán, leader of the "Once de las Rozas, their words still echo in my ears: "We know each year that Gefrema Ruta de las Rozas is special and is closely related to the weather, but has the virtue that defines very well who is who and each in GEFREMA." size Shall I?. Can I be one of them?. 10:00 a.m.
We hopped on the bus, I pass all front, suddenly a hint of panic seizes me: disobeying the orders of the High Command have not brought the four loose euros. With more fear than shame deposit a 20 euro note in the tray of the driver, crossing their fingers that do not make me get off for lack of coins. The driver, who looked like a longshoreman Mercamadrid, seeing the ticket exclaims: "Oh dear .." (moment of panic) "finally paid one ticket, do not know what I do today with so much junk (time relief). The driver returned me after a while foraging, 13 coins and 4 of 50 euro cents, and a collection of diverse monedillas would happy to numismatist of the antipodes, I keep the change without question.

Instant Roald Amundsen in whose honor is held every month of January, the traditional festive Rozas Route, also known as "Amundsen Memorial" in honor of the legendary explorer.

10:15 a.m. We travel several minutes, Bazan is directed to present to the surprise of some travel outside Gefrema that look as if it were an alien. And a little quieter, but still not daring to speak to anyone, try to name some of the faces, no doubt that individual from populated blonde hair, tall, slender figure, with good plant, graceful face and perfect smile, can not be other than legendary Moncloveño. On two occasions tried to sit for an autograph, but shyness and respect due me. 10:25 a.m.
We got off the bus. At the stop is a large group of people, exchange greetings together. The teacher sets his pair Bazán bags on the floor and begins to deliver a cyclopean books to attendees. Given that no one goes to me, I decided to make a payment receipt for payment of Caja Madrid and the hands holding the paper, I address Bazán, which I observed up and down, and gives me the desired volume of documentation and after that utters some incomprehensible and enigmatic words to me: "As it came to the former route, you have no schedule." After a brief moment of perplexity, a tremendous excitement over my person, the teacher Bazán has addressed to me personally and I have been given an impressive bound volume of documentation, which will keep as a relic of my life. Now I understand my grandmother, who told me many times when that trip to Rome with the Inserso, in which Pope John Paul II gave that Bible, and she felt an almost mystical emotion. Forgive me for laughing grandmother, I now understand and know how it feels. Certainly makes a terrible cold and sleet falls, may have brought few clothes. 10:35 a.m.
Bazán launches a fiery harangue to the present by invoking the spirit of the Eleven in Las Rozas. We started walking. What a thrill, my first ride, I can finally tell my friends I've been on a path Gefrema. Persistently keeps raining, snowing or rather, I have not brought umbrellas, but anyway, I have a jacket Cassava Commander authenticates that raised me 70 euros, which is valid for any type of adventure, plus a premiere trekking boots fit heptathlon for all types of terrain and weather conditions, I bought in the sales for 39.95 when they score 80, a whim go. Still snowing
10:55 a.m. started walking across the field, it is very cold and still snowing, the ground is slippery and sticky, try not to stain your new boots, but I can not keep up with these people, This worries me because there is a very thick fog and I have no idea where I am now if I lose you may not ever find me. 11:05 a.m.
It gives me like new boots stain of mud, that's what that milks. I still barely walking, but I dare not say that I wait, I feel some shame. In the background you can see a mound in top of a hill, there's someone there waiting. We went to that place, it seems that these people do not even know walk slowly up the hill. Barely reach them, trying to hide the panting, I have to prove I can be one of them, but increasingly I find it harder to walk, my boots are starting to transform itself into two balls of clay, also feel like pins in different parts of the foot heels, sides, etc. ..

The popular and admired photographer Capa photographed along the route with its versatile underwater camera. (Photo Moncloveño)

11:15 a.m. The person who was waiting at the top of the hill is none other than the teacher "Camorra", the mythical Javier Calvo Martinez, who along with William Wood Poza "Fuze" make up the unique trio of guides. That emotion, so a fort. Guides start talking about details of the route and what occurred there, all very interesting, start pointing directions in the horizon, but the bottom one is foggy and you see nothing, while the other guests nod in silence head, I repeat the gesture, even more strongly, to look one more, but the truth is that I am not aware of anything. Still snowing, very cold and the hill this blows a wind from hell. 11:25 a.m.
Guides pim-pam still give him stick you with the stories of the position, I keep nodding doing as I hear, but right now my concern is the cold I'm going. The jacket is is shit, I'm afraid I've been cheated, the cold seeps me to the bone and although I'm afraid it does not snow that begins to sink, but the clerk of Cassava Commander assured me that was waterproof. 11:35 a.m.
been more than 20 minutes and these guys keep talking, I'm dying of cold, while I nodded, which is beginning to provoke strong pain in the neck, while trying to guess places the fog on the horizon. I do not know if it will be by wind, but I fear that the ambient temperature is plummeting. I have to endure, I can not look like a pushover with these people. 11:45 a.m.
there is no way that they do not move here. Definitely the jacket is a mess, that if "water resistant" if "termoregularora", if such ... and milk, I'm afraid that is designed to wear it in the jeep when you go to pick up the kids to school to give you a pose Paris-Dakar, but for use in the field Nanai ...

Exceptional photograph taken by Capa, where we can enjoy a spectacular panoramic obtained from the Summit Apex. In the top right we see the town of Las Rozas, left the Republican positions are distinguished from the bridges. It was for this hillside where the attack took place machining of July 1937 that left the river valley that runs from right to left of the picture just behind the tree. (Please click on the picture to enlarge and to contemplate the details of it).

11:50 a.m. Finally we move, but a fort beyond 20 meters. My issues increase. As you begin to walk after about half an hour standing, I realize that what they were pricks in the foot, have become acute pain, as if I burned in different parts of the feet. There is no doubt that this dependent assured me that these boots were as gloves, folding his hands the dropouts I was getting ripped off too. I have saved your toe flexing gesture, "note that flexibility, see, see ... and I say, like a glove"
11:55 a.m. As we walked to another nearby fort, someone behind me yells "a balaaaaa ... "and mounted a stir. Soon other screams "two euroooos" racket again. Follow snowing.
12:05 p.m. Another talk in the fort which is located 25 meters from the first, and again nodded. It seems that there are still points on the horizon not to mention, I no longer where to look. Someone yells in the fog "a fifty euro din ...", again. I do not getting the joke, I'm obviously out of place. Still snowing and I dying of cold. 12:15 p.m.
started walking, I have so much mud on the feet that a potter could make a couple of jugs. The water begins to pass the "waterproofing" of the hunter, if I had the clerk in front ... It hurts the neck horrors to be nodding to the explanations of the guides like a chihuahua puppy that is put on the dashboard of gordinis on a crocheted blanket drawn up by the mother. Again I hear my back "ooootro euritooo" as it begins to load the rubbish.

forts One of the unique feature of the construction area. (Photo Layer)

12:20 p.m. I get barely move forward and suddenly he gets a tremendous left sanded by a venerable old man, a decent overtaking Fernando Alonso and Ferrari. Later I 'll find out that this beloved grandfather has over ninety years and was in the war. I sink into depression, it is clear that the people of Gefrema Bazán routes are of special pasta, I begin to suspect the existence of a magic potion Asterix type that people take on an empty stomach. Despite the blisters, I do not feel the cold feet. Another voice from behind me "toooooma ooootro Eurytus." The thing is not funny anymore.
12:30 p.m. We left a road, the neck is definitely seized me from the cold and nods his head. I agree that the hydrophobic brings a hood retracted into the neck, the bag and me cover my head. Pulling the strings to adjust feel a scrape on the back of the neck, my first thought is inclined to a hamstring injury, but what is broken is the hooded waterproof multisport. If you catch Cassava now Commander of noses are going to eat the waterproof zipper and buttons included.

The selfless route attendees are directed to a new position. (Photo Layer)

12:45 p.m. walked in single file along the road, I can not more, just keeps me proud to be able to become one of the elect, although also influenced by the fact that I have no idea where I am and I could not return. The cars, the fog, slow down when passing us. A vehicle stops almost completely with me in the passenger seat, an old lady with fearful expression crossed himself repeatedly while watching me. When peer achievement on again that tuition is in Lugo, we might have confused with the Holy Company.
12:55 p.m. We walked along the road, looks like we're walking back to Madrid. If I thought I had seen and heard it all regarding the findings of bullets and shrapnel euros more, no doubt I was wrong: IS JUST TO FIND A BOOK! With your documentation and credit cards CORRESPONDING. But that's not all, turns out to be a friend of one of the attendees. I do not know if I'm delirious from the cold effect, but this is completely unrealistic.
1:00 p.m. After not know how many miles, we arrived at what must have been another position, very similar to what we saw a while ago. And I wonder, could we not have said that a few miles away was this and that any day could easily go with our car?. But here we do not end my misery, suddenly begin to appear endless snacks and meats groups. I remember just over a coffee, and my stomach begins to boats as a Texan rodeo bull.

As on all routes could not miss the traditional and intimate time of the sandwich. (Photo Layer)

1:25 p.m. It seems that the "little walk" was to eat the sandwich in this lovely place. Return along the same path again. I think back to the potter, but two pitchers, I think it would have material to make two jars. I noticed on the way that smokers throw the ashes and butts in boats Tarradellas empty pate that lead to that end, we must recognize that have been very tough anti-smoking law.
Confirmed 1:50 p.m. definitely the go ahead has been lost, and we are taking a long detour to return, as we have come across a large gully (some argue that this is a covered way or long trench ) and you have to go around, though some are supporters threw himself to tackle the gigantic earrings. Eventually impose sanity and common sense, and surround the landfill. Finally, after who knows how many nautical miles back to the bus stop, although we lost was planned and we expect more than half an hour.

The tremendous gully that attendees had to go around, after a long discussion with the advocates of down it to reach its destination. (Photo Layer)

2:40 p.m. Finally appears the bus, I climb the last, God willing remaining seats. Drive the same stevedore-conductor from the first leg, going through my head the idea of \u200b\u200brevenge, the driver looked a smile (I think it reminds me nerd face, will know), put your hand in my pocket for all cent coins available. Panic, my pocket is empty, I find I have a hole in the lining where it has escaped all the loose and I did not hear, now I understand all the cries of "oooootro euritoooo" heard along the way, someone has made a killing at my expense. Luckily continuous portfolio in place, the inside pocket should be the only failure is not waterproof. But chewing the tragedy, after handing over the ticket for 20 euros on the way in my portfolio is only one of fifty, deposit into the tray with more fear than shame, I fear the worst. The driver, stevedore provides the ticket and his eyes twinkle of satisfaction under the eyebrow that crosses from left to right ear. He looks and smiles, has a gold tooth that shines as if it worked batteries. 2:43 p.m.
I turn to occupy one of the empty seats, I entered each and every one of the coins in his pocket monedillas my remaining operational. By the sound seems to come from the treasury division of Jack Sparrow, or what is worse, tambourines tuner work of the tuna.
3:05 p.m. We arrived at Moncloa, trying to sit up from my seat I'm starting to feel stuck, but I can not fail, I almost got, almost am one of them. I crawl to the exit and on the bus. With my best fake smile I say goodbye to the audience, some of them slaps me back to say goodbye, which endangers seriously my vertical. 3:12 p.m.
I'm on the subway platform. HE GOT IT!, I passed the test. I am imbued with the spirit of "The Eleven of Las Rozas, feel a great satisfaction and pride, despite my pitiful physical state. Comes the train, entered the car, including nine in the morning the young man sprawled on the seats, just live here. I take this situation to spread to two other seats.
3:45 p.m. I get to my station, I joined painfully heard several clicks to various parts of my anatomy, I have cramping and some cervical facial muscle, her face was slightly crooked and bent, drawing a face somewhere between terror and disgust. I move down the platform to move from "the famous dolls are directed to the portal." I meet with two old ladies arm in arm, noting with amazement and some fear they step back and around my position at a safe distance while looking at me. While away I hear: "what a pity the youth ... we do not know where to go."
4:00 p.m. I arrive home, fortunately my wife has gone with the children to the movies and can not see me in this sad trance. I get to my bedroom leaving behind a trail of globs of mud on the floor on which I will fulfilled bill insurance, if not cost me a divorce. I take off my wet boots and waterproof. After seeing me take off my socks and feet covered with sores, my imagination is moved to Molokai. I take my other clothes and introduce myself in bed. Than peace. I sleep with the satisfaction of knowing I'm one of them. I close my eyes and echo in my mind these epic words: "We know each year that Gefrema Ruta de las Rozas is special and is closely related to the weather, but has the virtue that defines very well who is who and each GEFREMA one. " Bazán I hope that the teacher be proud of me. For the way, give medals in this partnership?. Abilio


NOTE FROM THE EDITOR: in the day yesterday I contacted the Ovejero Abilio home informing him of the publication of her diary. When speaking to his wife, who initiated the divorce, I understand that is entered from the last Monday in respiratory medicine unit at the Clinical Hospital of Madrid in serious condition, but not feared for his life unless complications. Since the drafting of the sun and flies we want to send an affectionate greeting with our full support and wish him a speedy and successful recovery.

Florentino Sanders.


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